Saturday, 1 June 2013

Raise stop raised hands

“Thad” came the sound and Vipul came running out of his room....alas his worst fears came true. His Ma was on the floor and Baba was pouncing on her again. For a 10 year old this was too much to bear every night.
He thought to himself "No I cannot let this happen to Ma again and will I be able to look at my own face after looking at the blues and bruises of Ma’s", so inspite of repeated warnings of his dad he budged in and held his dad's hand...tightly....very tightly...with all the strength of a 10 yr old....

“Thad”...came a sound again and...again...and a physical impact which was enough to throw Vipul down on the ground.

It was not from his dad but from his mom...with a scream “How can you hold your dad’s hands and threaten him....he is a of the husband, your dad...he can do whatever he wants....”

22 years down the line, same household...same sounds...Thad...Fhat....thad!!!

Vipul was violently pouncing on his wife in front of his parents....and no one stopped him. People passing by the house could hear the slaughter but no one cared to even stop, this was normal, every day occurring.

(Legacy continues!!)

In the same house eight year old Ajay and ten year old Asha were looking from the corner.....
Asha " Ajay it will be alright. Don't worry, Ma said it is ok"
Ajay "No this is not can this be okay? Why should Baba beat up Ma just because he is a man?? Don't you remember what Teacher didi said? Man and woman are equal and no man should raise his hand on a woman. Teacher di is right....this is wrong and we will fight against it"

Ajay and Asha jumped to their mom’s rescue, in process got beaten up themselves several times but with each beating their values against violence became more and more strong....(with constant counselling and support of teacher didi)

(Correct Education had pierced through the thick walls of this house....Now change was inevitable)

Few more years down the line...

Same house but it exudes happiness and glow. People passing by can still hear noise but the noise is from kids playing, laughing. The deafening sound of kids running towards him, the smile and twinkle in his wife’s eyes when he enters the house  makes each day worth living for Ajay.......The change has happened...

This is a happy home....full of love, care, laughters and bliss.....Amay and Kriti both know how much Ma and Baba love each other and love both of them....(equally)

And in a neighboring town, Asha was in the kitchen hurriedly finishing up cooking. She has to help Puja (her 8 year old daughter) with her studies and complete her office project file also. Her husband was out of station.She heard loud noises from her neighbors house,fearing the worst she ran towards the house and saw the husband raising his hand to hit his wife and kids....


The sound was from the wife, raising her hand to stop the blow and shutting the door after leaving the house.

Asha took a deep breath...a relieved breath. Her conversation with the neighbor has had some impact. Finally she realized it was not right and stood up against the violence

(Legacy of education and righteousness will continue)..

This was a fictional depict the existence and reason behind existence of domestic violence in our country.

Yes...the abuser is mostly man of the house but Is the man really responsible for this behaviour?


Women are responsible....responsible for thinking getting beaten up by their husbands is okay and they impart the same education to their sons and daughters...who in turn would become the abuser and abusee....

It’s high time we realize that we need to change our social system based on gender bias. It is high time that we intervene through correct education and create a parallel system based on gender equality.

We do not need to educate only men...ofcourse we should talk to men also but the primary education needs to be provided to the woman and children of the house.

A woman should be educated and counselled about all the legal rights she has. Rights not against men but rights similar and equal to men...and she should be encouraged to pass on and share this knowledge with her children.

And all children compulsorily should be educated about gender equality at school. There should be programs specially designed for this starting at an early age of 5-6 years..

And last but not the least it is a responsibility of each and every parent to educate and practice gender equality at home.......same rules, same rights and same punishments for both boys and girls.

This will be more difficult for parents of boys (Yes boys not girls) because it is easy to teach any capable girl that you are capable no matter what anyone says....but it will be far more difficult to teach boys that you are capable only basis your efficiency and not because of your gender......

Let’s bring it out in open, bring it in our households...let’s take an initiative and talk about it with our kids today and on every possible occasion in future....

Let’s make homes safer for women 

This post is written with a focus on domestic violence, as a part of the initiative “Ring the bell for Indi Change” propelled by

Image courtsey


  1. Yes, the change begins at individual level...and putting up with abuse is as good as abusing someone.

    1. Yes Pankti, totally agree with you.


Leave Your Mark