Sunday, 30 June 2013

PADE Day 1 "Alone"

A very warm welcome to the first day of PADE. 

The theme for Day 1 is Alone.

Here is my interpretation of the theme

(C) Juz A Mum

"Hands held
Tears wiped
Sorrows exchanged
Smiles swapped
United in love

Alone but not alone"

This photograph was taken at an NGO for girls near my home. A place marked with innumerable painful stories and inexpressible laughters.

We look forward to visiting you all and seeing your interpretation of the theme!

How to Participate

1. In a post meant for this challenge, present an image(fresh or archived) that means “Alone” to you.
2. Include a link to this post in your blogpost and enter the link of your post in the linky tool below. (Links can be added till 31st July 2013)
Read here for more details and don’t hesitate to leave a comment
4. Take some time out and read other entries also and share your feedback

Please submit your entry for "Alone" here

Saturday, 29 June 2013

Firefly (Haiku)

death of light
loss of hope
firefly in a jar

Written for Haiku Heights Prompt Firefly


Late night chats, tucked in with you
Nothing to plan, nothing to worry,
Endless words, incessant chatter
Relentless gossips and inaudible laughters
You spoke I gasped, I spoke you grinned
You cried I wept, I sobbed you cried
Hands held together, nothing left unsaid
Hearts conjoined, tucked in the bed

The hidden signals, the veiled curses,
Your nose twist, my invisible wink, our rolling of eyes
Neighbourhood Romeos, my whistles, our sprints and our lies
Getting caught, getting punished, their shouts and sighs
Our promise to never do it again
And then doing it again

Never ending fun, never ending lessons
Memories of adolescence
Countless days
Countless nights

Countless moments with you

"Dedicated to my sweetheart sis...My best friend for life"

Friday, 28 June 2013

I walk barefoot

I walk barefoot with no direction
My direction lost with you
You scratched my soul
You stabbed deep in my heart
The void is still there
Your marks are still there
I look for you in no direction

I walk barefoot with no direction
I walk leaving blood spots
If you ever come looking for me
You will find my blood,
You will find pieces of me scattered here and there
I keep falling in no direction

I walk barefoot with no direction
With sin eating me away one by one
Nothing left, all eaten away
I only have eyes left, to wait for you
I wait for you in no direction

Written for  fireblosson friday on Real toads 

Thursday, 27 June 2013


Whenever you are lonely
Whenever you are sad
Just fill your heart with hopes
And try’n look ahead
He is there for you
Carrying all the reds
Sharing all the blues
He is there for you

Whenever you feel empty
Whenever you feel mad
Just fill your heart with feelings
And try’n move ahead
Because he is there for you
Walking with you
Checking all the moves
He is there for you

 Whenever you feel cheated
Whenever you feel left alone
Just fill your heart with visions
And try’n see ahead
Because he is there for you
Sharing your vision

Looking out for you, to see you go through
He is there for you

Whenever you are on top
Whenever you feel complete
Just fill your heart with thanks
And try’n look back
He was there for you
He is there for you
And he will be there for you

Penned on 21st July 1997

This is dedicated to the hero, the mentor, the guide in everyone’s life. Some have their parents, some their teachers and some their friends but I am dedicating this to the hero of my life “God” because he is the only one always there for me, looking out for me, loving me, taking care of me, the one with whom I have always shared all my feelings.

I know many don’t believe in his presence but I can feel him all the time. I can feel his hands always on my shoulders holding me tight

Image credit Flicker-ironrodart

Tearful Goodbye (Haiku)

© Peggy Goetz

abandoned gaze
a shattered dream
tearful goodbye

Written for Peggy's hosting at Real Toad's with prompt - About Face

Your face

Big eyes, naughty smile
Chin under the chin
With dimples to kill
Your face, my world

Curled lashes, lovely brows
Innocent tears, killer flare
Your face, my world

(C) Juz a Mum

Long hair, melting stare
Feelings so true, Love so rare
Your face, my world

Earnest grin, beaming ear to ear
Thousand looks, scuttling here to there
Your face, my world

Your face my world
Your hugs my heaven
Your kiss my bliss
Your words my books
Your eyes my dreams
Your touch my life
Your face my world life

Wednesday, 26 June 2013


in my arms
crescendo of music
first cry


under the tree
crescendo of love



your love
world of pleasure
crescendo of pain


wrinkled touch
hands held under the ruins
crescendo of love

Written for Haiku Heights #259 Prompt Crescendo

Image Flicker

Tuesday, 25 June 2013

Is there a bad mother?

When you become a parent, more specifically a mother two things invariably happen. One you become an invisible member of all parents groups in the world and two your life becomes an open book for everyone and anyone to judge and give advice.

In my last 4.5 years of being a mother, I have been judged, criticized and applauded for same practice innumerable times. Each day as a parent I encounter parenting specialists who have a ready-made solution for everything. These specialists include my neighbors,  my maid, friend of a neighbor,  relative of a neighbor,  friends, Aunties from my building, Uncles from my building, Aunties on the road, Uncles on the road etc etc....

Parenting is a specialization that doesn’t require any professional knowledge. Infact you don’t even have to be a parent to judge and pass advice to other parents. As long as you have eyes and you know how to talk, you are eligible to advise, criticize and comment.

As a mother I am always trying my best like all mothers and as a mother I do not appreciate advice from people who are not parents or who have not brought up kids...young, old..I don’t care. If you have not experienced parenting in any form, you have no idea what is right for my kids. Do not stand from a distance and judge others, if you have guts jump in and then we will talk. I don’t mind experienced advice. But what I do mind is “Being forced to take the advice”.

I should have the freedom to decide whether I want to take the advice for my kid or not. All recommendations stemming from experience are welcome but still it doesn’t give a right to anyone to judge. And I shouldn’t be expected to follow all advice.

No mother is a bad mother because she decides differently from you or she does things which are not accepted norms.

Again what is accepted in one family/circle/society/religion is different from others. So in effect every mother will be a bad mother by some criteria or other.

Earlier I thought because I am an inexperienced mother that’s why may be I am a vulnerable target but second time around, no such reasons. Same advice, same recommendations and same judgements. It doesn’t help that I have a 4 year old very well behaved child who eats well, sleeps on time, is socially active and physically fit (Apologies for bragging).

I do try to not let this affect me too much but there is so much clutter of information that it does reach me, there is so much judgement about everything that it does make me question my decisions.

Parenting and motherhood is one of the most difficult jobs in the world and every child is different. With so many judging eyes any mother is bound falter, to make mistakes. I really urge everyone to please step back and give us a break. I truly believe in my heart that every mother has her kid’s best interest in her mind. Give her the benefit of doubt, Let her be.

"I am struggling, getting up, falling down, learning and unlearning each day as a mother. Don't cast a shadow, just help me grow"

Image flicker

Gion Festival

Young boy
Wearing a robe and crown
Eager to cut the chord

Image courtsey Flicker

Monday, 24 June 2013

My Rock

You stood by me and saw me rise
You were my earth, my wings

You held my hands and let me soar
You were my steps, my core

You walked with me to new heights
You were my guide, my light

You flew with me to the sky
You were my flight, my eyes

My Rock

I fell down,
You stood by me
You stood by me to see me drown
You stood by me and saw me sink
You stood by me and saw me fail
You stood by me and saw me fall
You stood by me and never picked me up
You chained me and pushed me down

My Rock

Written for Poetry Jam with prompt - rock
Linked up with Toads
Image credit Flicker

Sunday, 23 June 2013


Anyone can become a dad; but it takes a lot to be a dad
Daddyhood is not a day, Daddyhood is not a moment
Daddyhood is lifetime

It’s getting up in morning and seeing both of them safely tucked in with you
It’s the cup of milk vanished before I could look
Hours and hours of your struggles with crayons and outlines
It’s your patient learning and unlearning of nursery rhymes
It’s your arms around both of them before they could fall
It’s the silent tears in your eyes when they did fall
Every hug that came my way with a wink to you
Every kiss on my cheeks linked to you
It’s the awesome Maggi daddy ishtyle
Hours of Q&A with a smile

It’s the way you say a lot of things, without uttering a word
It’s the way you are there with us, even in your absence
It’s your knowing smile at the end of the day
It’s your gentle touch to wipe my worries away

I want to thank you for all these said and unsaid precious moments

Being with you has transformed my ordinary life into “an extraordinary journey”

"Dedicated to all  wonderful Dads who make Daddyhood as special as Mommyhood"

Green Paddy

Lush green;
I talk to you
I talk to myself


I saw your grow,
From seedling to full crop
Time to say good bye


Rows of green
Under the blue of sky;
Food to soul

Image courtsey

Saturday, 22 June 2013


Hot bowl of curry
I lick the fingers;
And taste you


Layers on layers
I peel the onion;
Nothing but tears


Smell of food in air
Both run to the garbage bin;
The dog wins

For Haiku Heights ‘ lunch’

Tips for stressed out new parents

A small bundle of joy is a source of instant excitement and love. This is the part that every first time parent is prepared for but with it comes a lot of stress and fatigue. A splurge of emotions that can’t be called happy ones. It doesn't matter how much you read, how much you try to learn before hand, nothing prepares you for the whirlwind that’s about to come.

Please don’t think that I am saying that it is not a happy occasion. Ofcourse it is and most probably it is one of the happiest moments of your life. But parenting doesn’t stop at that moment. It starts with it. The whole preparation of nine months was not about that one moment, the first cry. In the awe of that moment we forget to look closely at our emotions and by the time we realised how stressed we are, it looks like there is no way out.

This is especially tough for first time parent. By second time you are already a parent, you have experienced the stress and fatigue and you know that it will not last forever.

It happened with me also. First time I was so stressed about everything that I do not even remember enjoying the first few months, infact I do not remember first few months of my elder one at all, except for the sleepless nights, the diaper changes and the constant 24 hr crying but I am sure this was not all. Now when I did enjoy the first few months of my second one, I really wonder why did I not do that after my first baby.

Looking back I think there are a few things that if I knew or really believed it would have been easier for me. I have tried to encapsulate them below:

Surrender: Yes surrender to motherhood, don’t fight it. This is a rookie mistake a first time mother could do. Though you may completely devote yourself to the baby, you would keep going back to you earlier self, your free memories and would compare them with being with an infant (I know every mother does it but most don’t admit). It doesn’t matter whether you admit it or not but acknowledge the feeling and remember to not fight the phase. If you completely surrender 100% and don’t think of earlier memories,it will become easier for you (It will tempt and create dissatisfaction)  

Take a break: I earlier said surrender but along with that do remember you are only a human being taking care of another human being. You are not a machine. It is very important for you to take a break. It doesn't have to be a big break. It can be a very short break of 15-20 minutes (You can lock yourself in the bedroom and read a book for 10-15 min, or could go for a short walk, with baby obviously safely kept with your partner or anyone trusting)

This break is essential for your sanity and for your baby’s well being also. An infant is an extension of you, he knows you inside out. He can sense if you are tired or stressed, this makes him more stressed, so you being calm and relaxed is also better for the baby.

Do not overdo: Yes, we tend to overdo and over care. If the floor is not mopped 20 times in the day, it is okay. If you don’t wash your baby’s clothes in a special laundry cycle its okay, if your baby cries with your partner and you go for a walk its okay. Bring the standards a notch down!

Share responsibility: You are a mother, your primary responsibility is your child right now. So share other responsibilities in the house, take help, ask for help and if that is not possible than bring standard down even in household duties. It’s okay to eat cold food once in a while, Newspaper spill on the floor can remain on the floor, clothes piled in the corner can remain in the corner etc

Perspective: It is very important to keep the long term perspective in mind but along with that take each day as it comes. Don’t plan and schedule too many things, babies are unpredictable. And remember that this is just a phase, it will soon be over, those small hands and feet will outgrow themselves, out of the house and of your enjoy each day.

Take notes: Yes take notes. This is what I didn’t do properly for my elder one. I have some of his milestones written somewhere but I am not talking about bookish milestones. There are a lot of small things that look small right now but will become invaluable memories in future. These are the moments no one ever thinks of recording like the first time the baby smiled at you, laughed at you, looked at you directly, slept for more than an hour, your first trip out of the house, your first trip out of the city, his first toy etc etc.

Remember you are a good mother: Always remember you are good mother. Don't doubt yourself. If possible do this exercise daily, repeat at least 5 times, "I am a good mother" never mind if once you slept a little more than your baby, if you didn't pick him/her up at the first cry, even if you feed him cereal from a box... you still are a good mother!

These were some of things that I really really wish I knew the first time. If this helps you even in a small way, I would be really glad. Trust me few years down the line you won’t even remember the tough time.....and till then just Go with the flow and build beautiful memories

Thanks to Dr. Gauri Kekre for recommending the last point.

Image courtesy: