FUN AND LEARN

My 4 year old primarily speaks Hindi, with some English words thrown here and there. This was a conscious decision taken by us because we wanted him to learn and speak his mother tongue but we were aware that his education will be in another language “English”.

So when he turned around 4 and I could see that he comprehends the difference between both the languages I thought it was the right time to teach to him the language.

But No.1 disagreed..it was not his idea of spending free time with his mum. He wanted to play , fight, paint, dance etc etc.You see, he cannot sit at one place.....has attention span of about 1 minute....and is remotely not interested in anything that his mum wants him to learn.

I call it “the Mommy disorder”.

Well i had the worst case .Everything that he associates with studies...he disassociates with me, mumma for him is for everything else BUT not studies. I wanted him to learn but not by force and pressure ...hence everytime i would teach him something he would run away and say “Oh mumma..stop talking about it pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee...

So in order to tackle the disorder and make learning interesting for him. I devised a devious “Mummy plan” ...... Games incorporating everything that he likes...running around, painting, hitting, dancing and what i want to make him learn....

I have divided things that he needs to learn in two parts: Daily conversation and comprehensive language learning.

“Let them be” Not or “Let them be”- with Conditions apply

I keep reading and keep getting this advice from a lot of mothers that the best way to grow up a kid is to let him be, to let him learn from his mistakes..

I also believe that its important that he grows up to be an independent and a strong individual. That he knows how to take a decision and accepts its consequences but then where does my role as a parent comes???

I believe you cannot let them be completely. There should be a balance infact the balance has to be tilted towards parental control in the first few years of a child’s life and then maybe later it can be equally divided...till he moves out......:-)

But how to achieve this balance?

The key is to decide basis the age and individuality of child which decisions the child is old enough to take and where you need to step in?

Here's how i have somehow managed to handle the situation where the kid is a strong individual and does things his way but there are a few things which I decide and he needs to follow strictly. I do make it a point to explain to him again and again reasons for things that I ask him to do.

Obviously there are hiccups,situations which end up in tantrums, crys, yells etc etc. But the more seriously i follow the list, the more easy it has become with each day.

Build memories

As a parent it is very important for me that my kids grow up with a bag full of joyful memories.
Stories driven by them, lifes sculpted around them, hours and hours dedicated to them...magical journey called " Growing up!!!!!"
Everyday when they get up they should be filled with hope and anticipation about the day to come. My house should scream of laughs, happiness,noise, dance and music and hence mess and fingerprints all around.
This i want to follow as much as i can and as long as i can. Ofcourse I know this may not work everytime, there will be very good days, good days and not so good days but any day should have some elements of love, magic and laughter to it, doesn't matter how off the day was.

Oh yes i already have had my share of "not soo good" exhausting and tiring days. Both boys falling sick together, both boys and mum falling sick, kids snapping @ each other (hitting not allowed, understood thoroughly by no.1),non stop cuts, bruises, runny noses, bangss, booms etc etc but then comes the "Tadaa moments". Both of them laughing together (mind u no.1 is 4 yrs and no.2 is 10 months), playing together, No.1 scolding me for being rude to his baby (no.2), wet kisses from runny noses, endless hugs out of nowhere,being told again and again how much i am loved...list goes on and on....

Project @ home

Staying @ home-not working after having kids should be the most difficult decision anyone has to take.This blog is how I became "Juz Mom" after working for 7 long years and after a flourishing and fulfilling career.

I was a working mom for the first 2 years of my elder sons life.And then I decided to"Quit".--take a break--a sabbatical -- not work in office for sometime.

What led to the decision were a lot of different factors- largely more personal and selfish reasons than my son.
And I had quit. From that "Quit this job day" to now my life has completely changed.
I started out as a very strong individual. Wanting my space, my freedom, my me time, loving me also along with my son. The break was meant to be for me also. Dont get me wrong I did love my son to death but when the @ home project started the idea was not only to spend time with my kid but also to spend time doing things that i enjoy (alone!!!!!!!!!!)

But down the line- more than 2 years later, Here I am - sitting in a stained night dress, smelling of food, milk, baby powder and Love!!!!!!!

I dont know what happened, when did my "@ home project" became "Juztamom project" But:-

• Am I complaining- "absolutely not"
• Am I Happy- :Blissfully happy and content"
• Do I miss office- "Oh hell yessssssss"
• Do I miss it enough to go back-"Oh hell noooooooooooooo"

My life right now is my kids. I am shamelessly in love with them. Yes there are days when i feel trapped, harrassed, hassled , short of breath and (all other similar adjectives). There are days when I want to run to jungle and take Sanyaas. But you know what i felt same when i was working also. What is different is when i was in office and felt suffocated I never wanted to go back. But now when i feel suffocated...I still want to be in the same space, not by guilt or duty but by sheer love for my kids.